American Scholar By Ralph Waldo Emerson Essays - Transcendentalism

American Scholar By Ralph Waldo Emerson The American Scholar by Ralph Waldo Emerson In the essay the American Scholar, Emerson portrays the scholar as a person who learns from three main things. These things by which a scholar is educated are by nature, by books (the past) and by action. Emerson uses nature as a comparison to the human mind where he states, There is never a beginning, there is never an end to the inexplicable continuity of this web of God, but always circular power returning into itself.(296) The human mind is an object that is boundless and can be full of so much beauty and intellect such as nature can be. Emerson continues to explain how classification begins among the young minds. To the young mind, every thing is individual, stands by itself. Emerson presents this idea as a negative effect on the scholar because they seem to continue to break things down trying to find simple answers to complex questions. Man is then convinced that he and it (nature) proceed from one root; one is leaf and one is flower.(296) This thinking of man is the opposite from the truth of the relationship between nature and himself. He shall see that nature is the opposite of the soul. Its laws are the laws of his own mind.(296) According to Emerson, the next influence on the scholar is the mind of the past, where he uses books to convey his ideas. Books are the best things, well used; abused, among the worst.(297) Books were originally intended for good. The scholar of the first age, received into him the world around; brooded thereon; gave it the new arrangement of his own mind, and uttered it again.(297) According to Emerson, books can have a negative effect on the way the scholar should think. Instead of Man Thinking, we have the bookworm.(297) Emerson feels that the scholar should learn things for themselves and not easily accept the views and opinions presented by a writer in their books. He further on continues to state how books They look backward and not forward. But genius always looks forward. The eyes of man are set in his forehead, not in his hind head.(298) Emerson thus believes that all men have the capacity of being a genius. Man hopes. Genius creates.(298) But, Emerson does not encourage peo ple to be genius because the Genius is always the sufficiently enemy of the genius by over-influence.(298) Emerson believes that books are for the scholars idle times(298) and the only subjects that he should learn from reading are history and exact science. The action of the scholar is important to Emerson. Action is with the scholar subordinate, but it is essential. Without it, he is not yet man inaction is cowardice, but there can be no scholar without the heroic mind.(299) Emerson wants the scholar to learn but question everything. The true scholar grudges every opportunity of action past by, as a loss of power.(300) Emerson also places a value on action. The final value of actionis, that it is a resource.(301) Through action man has transformed himself into Man Thinking. The mind now thinks; now acts; and each fit reproduces the otherhe has always the resource to live.(301) English Essays

Referenda Election and Outcome Essay examples

Referenda Election and Outcome Essay examples Referenda: Election and Outcome Essay examples To what extent are referenda harmful to UK representative democracy? A referendum is a popular vote in which the electorate decides an issue by answering â€Å"yes† or â€Å"no† to a question. In the UK, the question is set by the government; they can make it a mandatory referendum, where they use the outcome of the referendum is usually binding, as it has been held under certain circumstances or an advisory referendum, where the government can look at the outcome, then choose whether to act with the majority, or against it. There are also pre-legislative referendums, which are held before legislation is enacted by parliament, and there are post-legislative referendums, which are held after legislation is enacted by Parliament. They are devices of direct democracy, but they do not always live up to their democratic pretensions. Referendums are seen to be a way of preventing governments from making unpopular decisions; by listening to the majority vote, it can show Parliament how they should be making their decisions and stopping governments from losing voters at the next general election. For example, the 1998 peace settlement in Northern Ireland, there was a turnout of 81%, which means that this was a very popular question set forward, with a vast mass of the public having an opinion on it; with the yes vote receiving 71.7% and the no vote receiving 28.9%. If the government had decided not to make a peace settlement with Ireland, then a small amount of people would have been satisfied with the outcome. However, they also represent the tyranny of the majority. This means that those minorities who do not feel the same way, may suffer as a result of the verdict. In the 1973 referendum to decide where Northern Ireland should remain a part of the UK, the no vote received 1.1% of the electorate. This meant that those who felt that Northern Ireland should separate from the UK ended up not receiving the outcome they desired. The UK population may be more likely to respect and conform to decisions that they have made or at least had a say in themselves. In general elections in the current representative democracy system in place in the UK, given the nature of our democracy, the public have to choose a policy, instead of making their own. This means that politicians can just make rancid decisions and expect the public to just comply. However, some issues are too complex for the public to understand, so instead of making a sound and justified decision about their beliefs, many voters just pick a choice at random, which means that there isn’t a fully valid outcome. For example, in California in 1996, there was a referendum to decide whether the state should legalise marijuana or leave it illegal. As many people just approved of the idea of legal drugs, the outcome was sound, and the state legalised marijuana. This means that whatever the outcome turns out to be, the government is undermined and it bec omes harder for the government to rule the country. Referendums allow the public to be more involved in politics, not just around the time of general elections. In general elections, voters vote on a package of issues, whereas in referendums they get to make their own choice whenever they need to. This means that people would be more educated and interested in politics, as they would be more well-informed about how the government is running the country, and not just necessarily hear about the major decisions, but also some of the minor ones as well. Conversely, people may use referendums as a verdict of the general

Criminal Justice Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 250 words - 5

Criminal Justice - Essay Example In the correction, responsibilities of prison are the safekeeping of inmates, maintenance and improving welfare of inmates. Safekeeping requires that inmates are controlled; securely locked away, while giving them some moments for recreation, counseling, and education. Despite welfare efforts, inmates feel dehumanized and suffer condemnation and rejection by society and as a result breed ill feelings. When subjected to solitary confinement, which is one of prison’s recourse, psychological effects results to â€Å"dissatisfactions in life, delusions, panic feelings, claustrophobia, depression and madness†. Imprisonment is a host to other related psychological problems that results to trauma, mental and physical illnesses to some. As of 2006, the Bureau of Justice System estimated that there are about 705,000 jailed persons who are mentally ill, and that its growing number affects the correction policy of the government(Pollard, Anita, n.d.) Inmates receive health care while incarcerated, but the problem begins when they are released. Many of them, after spending years in prison are unemployed, have no means of livelihood, experience difficulties in reintegration to society, and lack health care insurance. As psychological problems become statewide occurrences, and reintegration to society even becomes more difficult upon their release from prison, the government is looking for possibilities that they be covered by Medicaid to access health care. Likewise, as a standard procedure, inmates go into various forms of counseling and physical activities while in prison. As trauma becomes a psychological problem by many of the inmates, researches have been done by medical practitioners on how to address psychological problems of inmates. Trauma, that has been tangled with experiences of mental illness, substance abuse, and behavioral problems often results to psychiatric disorder. (Wallace, B.C and

Leadership and communication Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 750 words

Leadership and communication - Essay Example It is fair to say that how a leader communicates is dependent upon his or her generation. According to the article entitled â€Å"Communication and Leadership,† â€Å"Effective communication occurs only if the receiver understands the exact information or idea that the sender intended to transmit†(â€Å"Communication and Leadership,† 2010). In this case, the leader would be the sender, and their audience would be the receiver. The leader will need to be aware of how his or her generation chooses to communicate and modify their own communication to these specifications in order for the communication to be deemed effective. A leader speaking to a group from the 1950s would use markedly different communication than a leader speaking to a group in 2011. The characteristics of my generation today in terms of communication is fairly simple. My generation is one that believes in swiftness and efficiency. This is likely due to having grown up in a society where people ge t what they want when they want it, also known as a fast food mentality. This mindset has become a part of many other aspects of life including communication. People want to get their information quickly and with little hassle or confusion. An example of this type of communication can be seen in the emails and text messages that are used in a great deal of communication. The minimal size of text messages in particular has spawned a huge array of abbreviations and shorthand words in order to communicate in as few words as possible. Additionally, it is important to note that another characteristic of my generation’s communication is a certain boldness. This is due to the anonymity that many people have become accustomed to because of the isolation and separation from face to face interaction that technology gives. This has resulted in the development of new social problems such as cyber bullying and sexting. Leaders in my generation tend to be different as well. Today’s leader has to strike a fine balance between the qualities of intelligence and responsibility and a good personality. Other generations may not have found likability to be so important, but my generation definitely does. Additionally, looks play an important part as well. Good looking people tend to find themselves in leadership positions more often than those who are not as good looking. Strong speaking skills are also needed in order to be a leader in today’s world. Perhaps a prime example of this would be the current President Barrack Obama. He is a good speaker, well-educated, and a strong orator. He often goes on talk shows such as Jay Leno in order to showcase his personality and sense of humor. The role of president is perhaps one of the most valued leadership roles in the entire world. Modern presidents typically have these characteristics because today’s generation strongly respond to these qualities, and that is why these type of people tend to be elected into leadership positions. Technology and the Information Age have played a very large role in how leaders communicate today. Many of the most influential leaders of today have their own websites in order to present specific information to their audience. Additionally, the invention of such tools as Youtube, podcasts, and Skype have allowed leaders to reach their audiences in many different formats. For the most part, technology has given leaders easy access to their audience

Economic for Managers Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 2500 words

Economic for Managers - Essay Example The failure in major financial markets exists because of either of these conditions. Prior to the financial crisis, the financial markets such as stocks, bonds and mutual funds markets are considered markets where the invisible hand operates. The stock market has always been referred to as an efficient market by economists. According to Brealey, Myers and Marcus, â€Å"the competition [in this market] to find misvalued stocks is intense. So when new information comes out, investors rush to take advantage of it and thereby eliminate any profit opportunities (2004, 165).† An efficient market, according to Samuelson and Nordhaus in their book â€Å"Economics† is defined as â€Å"one where all new information is quickly understood by market participants and becomes immediately incorporated into the market prices (2004, 534).† This characteristic of the stock market as an efficient market is attributed to the availability of timely information which is incorporated in the prices of the stocks. The stock market indeed needs investors who believe that the market is inefficient in order to make the market efficient. As investors think that there is a certain degree of inefficiency in the market, these investors’ notion of the stock prices are that they are underpriced, and there is a chance to profit from this situation. Therefore, as investors believe in this inefficiency, and the possible reward of profiting from these undervalued stocks, they are driven to action. When investors are driven to action, they look for more sources of information, analyze the information and push the prices up or down depending on the value of the information as regards the certain stock. When investors are prompted to take action either by driving the prices of the stocks up or down depending on the information, the direction of the prices tend to be that which incorporates the value of the information—thus, eliminating the possible profits from buying

Isolation of Protein by Ammonium Sulphate Precipitation

Isolation of Protein by Ammonium Sulphate Precipitation Hypothesis Rubisco is a negatively charged protein that weighs 55,000 kDa and is also very soluble. When we add ammonium sulfate to reach a saturation of 50%, Rubisco can be isolated using ion exchange chromatography and protein electrophoresis. Materials and Methods Isolation of Protein by Ammonium Sulfate Precipitation Approximately 300g of fresh spinach leaves were de-ribbed and dried, then homogenized for 1 minute in 200mL of buffer. From the homogenized solution, approximately 50ml was placed into a beaker, which was stirred on a stir plate while 10.90g of solid ammonium sulfate was slowly added to reach 37% saturation. The solution was stirred for an additional 10 minutes and then centrifuged at 9,000-xg for 15 minutes. The pellet (Pellet I) was resuspended in 4mL of water and transferred into a dialysis bag for dialysis against distilled water. The supernatant was poured into a beaker and stirred on a stir plate while about 3g of ammonium sulfate was slowly added to reach 50% saturation. After about 15 minutes of stirring, the supernatant was centrifuged for 15 minutes at 7,000-xg. Following centrifugation, the pellet (Pellet II) was resuspended in 4mL of water and transferred into a dialysis bag for dialysis. Ion Exchange Column Chromatography The column was equilibrated by running 30mL of Buffer A (10mM Tris pH 8.0, 3mM EDTA) through. Afterwards, a centrifuge was used to pellet down any solid precipitate out of the dialyzed samples. 1mL of each sample (Pellet I and II) was transferred into labeled Eppendorf tubes and frozen for later use in the SDS-PAGE. Pellet I was diluted a 100-fold and about 4mL of diluted Pellet I and undiluted Pellet II were loaded into separate columns and the samples were allowed to flow through. The flow-through was discarded. 10mL of the low salt buffer (Buffer A + 50mM NaCl) was loaded onto the column and fractions of approximately 2mL were collected in separate cuvettes and labeled in order. After blanking the spectrophotometer at 280nm with low salt buffer, the OD readings of each fraction was measured. This process was repeated using the medium salt buffer (Buffer A + 200mM NaCl) and high salt buffer (Buffer A + 500mM NaCl). The spectrophotometer was blanked with each buffer before the readings of its corresponding fractions were obtained. The fractions with the highest OD reading at 280nm was collected in an Eppendorf tube, labeled, and placed on ice. The column was then washed with 10mL resin cleaning buffer which was discarded in a wash beaker. Protein Electrophoresis 30uL of 3X Sample Buffer (bromophenol blue, glycerol, dithiothreitol, and SDS) was added to 60ul of each of the 9 samples (standard, homogenate, Pellet I, Pellet I low, medium and high salt buffers, Pellet II low, medium and high salt buffers). The 9 tubes were heated in a water bath for 4 minutes. Into a prepared buffer chamber, approximately 20uL of each sample were loaded into separate wells using thin-barrel pipette tips. The gel was run at 180 Volts for approximately 50 minutes. The gel was removed from the glass plate sandwich and stained in Staining/Fixing Solution for 30 minutes. The gel was destained overnight in Destaining Solution and then dried ona vacuum gel dryer for one hour. Results Table 1: ODwavelength Readings of Protein Fractions for Pellet I OD Reading (280nm) Tube Low Salt Medium Salt High Salt 1 0.202 -0.077 0.020 2 0.162 0.022 -0.083 3 -0.015 -0.077 -0.059 4 0.246 0.003 -0.068 5 0.002 0.020 0.052 OD readings (280nm) for the fractions were measured using a spectrophotometer after they eluted from the ion exchange column. Table 2: OD Readings of Protein Fractions for Pellet II OD Reading (280nm) Tube Low Salt Medium Salt High Salt 1 HI 0.121 -0.069 2 HI 0.687 -0.059 3 1.442 -0.017 -0.095 4 0.963 0.025 0.200 5 0.229 -0.049 0.320 OD readings (280nm) for the fractions were measured using a spectrophotometer after they eluted from the ion exchange column. Table 3: Known Protein Standards, Relative Molecular Weights and Distance Traveled on Gel Proteins Distance Traveled (mm) Molecular Weight (Daltons) Phosphorylase b 80 97,000 Albumin 130 66,000 Ovalbumin 200 45,000 Carbonic anhydrase 260 30,000 Trypsin Indicator 20,100 Lactalbumin 14,400 The molecular weights of the proteins are known and the distance traveled was gotten by measuring with a ruler from the top of the well to the band of each band. Weight (kDa) Solutions of proteins with known weights were loaded and run in SDS-PAGE and the distance was measured from the top of the well to the bottom of the band. Table 4: title Sample # Sample No. of bands Migration distance (cm) Molecular Weight (kDa) 1 Pellet I Low salt 2 PI Medium salt 3 PI High salt 4 PI 1 2.7 28 5 Pellet II Low salt 1 2.8 26 6 PII Medium salt 7 PII High salt 8 Standard 1 2 3 4 0.8 1.3 2 2.6 97 66 45 30 9 Homogenate 1 2 3 1.8 2.3 2.6 50.3 36 30 The number of bands were tallied, then the molecular weight was collected as well as the migration distance. The migration was found by measuring from the top of the well to the bottom of the band. Four bands showed in the lane where the standard was loaded instead six, because there were six proteins present in the sample this does not make sense to me. Three bands give sizes appeared in the homogenate and one band in Pellet I and Pellet II low salt. Discussion Rubisco weighs 55,000 kDa according to literature and gel bands that correlate with it that size did not appear in either of the samples. It was predicted Rubisco is very negatively charged and very soluble, therefore it should elute the column at a high salt concentration because a large concentration of salt should be needed to disrupt the bonds created between the negatively charged ion of Rubisco and the positively charged resin, but the high salt buffer fractions had some of the lowest OD readings which is conflicting with our prediction. Instead, the OD readings were highest with the low salt buffer concentration. This could mean that Rubisco is not as negatively charged and soluble as we predicted. I cannot clearly conclude if Rubisco was isolated or not because the gel ripped and a big chunk of it was missing due to mishandling. Also, Rubisco might have been lost due to contamination because they were no bands that correlated with its molecular weight. Good! The quality of the experiment could be improved by some additional methods to identify Rubisco since it fixes carbon dioxide. Therefore they could be a test to show that the protein that was isolated can actually fix carbon dioxide.

The Vampire Diaries: Dark Reunion Chapter Seven

Stefan approached the corner house reluctantly, almost afraid of what he might find. He half expected that Damon would have abandoned his post by now. He'd probably been an idiot to rely on Damon in the first place. But when he reached the backyard, there was a shimmer of motion among the black walnut trees. His eyes, sharper than a human's because they were adapted for hunting, made out the darker shadow leaning against a trunk. â€Å"You took your time getting back.† â€Å"I had to see the others home safe. And I had to eat.† â€Å"Animal blood,† Damon said contemptuously, eyes fixed on a tiny round stain on Stefan's T-shirt. â€Å"Rabbit, from the smell of it. That seems appropriate somehow, doesn't it?† â€Å"Damon-I've given Bonnie and Meredith vervain too.† â€Å"A wise precaution,† Damon said distinctly, and showed his teeth. A familiar surge of irritation welled up in Stefan. Why did Damon always have to be so difficult? Talking with him was like walking between land mines. â€Å"I'll be going now,† Damon continued, swinging his jacket over one shoulder. â€Å"I've got business of my own to take care of.† He tossed a devastating grin over his shoulder. â€Å"Don't wait up.† â€Å"Damon.† Damon half turned, not looking but listening. â€Å"The last thing we need is some girl in this town screaming ‘Vampire!' † Stefan said. â€Å"Or showing the signs, either. These people have been through it before; they're not ignorant.† â€Å"I'll bear that in mind.† It was said ironically, but it was the closest thing to a promise Stefan had ever gotten from his brother in his life. â€Å"And, Damon?† â€Å"Now what?† â€Å"Thank you.† It was too much. Damon whipped around, his eyes cold and uninviting, a stranger's eyes. â€Å"Don't expect anything of me, little brother,† he said dangerously. â€Å"Because you'll be wrong every time. And don't think you can manipulate me, either. Those three humans may follow you, but I won't. I'm here for reasons of my own.† He was gone before Stefan could gather words for a reply. It wouldn't have mattered anyway. Damon never listened to anything he said. Damon never even called him by name. It was always the scornful â€Å"little brother.† And now Damon was off to prove how unreliable he was, Stefan thought. Wonderful. He'd do something particularly vicious just to show Stefan he was capable of it. It was no use. He couldn't keep his mind on the puzzle. He was tired and lonely and in desperate need of comfort. And the stark truth was that there was no comfort to be had. Elena, he thought, you lied to me. It was the one thing she'd insisted on, the one thing she'd always promised. â€Å"Whatever happens, Stefan, I'll be with you. Tell me you believe that.† And he had answered, helpless in her spell, â€Å"Oh, Elena, I believe it. Whatever happens, we'll be together.† But she had left him. Not by choice maybe, but what did that matter in the end? She had left him and gone away. There were times when all he wanted was to follow her. Think about something else, anything else, he told himself, but it was too late. Once unleashed, the images of Elena swirled around him, too painful to bear, too beautiful to push away. The first time he'd kissed her. The shock of dizzy sweetness when his mouth met hers. And after that, shock after shock, but at some deeper level. As if she were reaching down to the core of himself, a core he'd almost forgotten. Frightened, he'd felt his defenses tear away. All his secrets, all his resistance, all the tricks he used to keep other people at arm's length. Elena had ripped through them all, exposing his vulnerability. Exposing his soul. And in the end, he found that it was what he wanted. He wanted Elena to see him without defenses, without walls. He wanted her to know him for what he was. Terrifying? Yes. When she'd discovered his secret at last, when she'd found him feeding on that bird, he had cringed in shame. He was sure that she'd turn away from the blood on his mouth in horror. In disgust. But when he looked into her eyes that night, he saw understanding. Forgiveness. Love. Her love had healed him. And that was when he knew they could never be apart. Other memories surged up and Stefan held on to them, even though the pain tore into him like claws. Sensations. The feel of Elena against him, supple in his arms. The brush of her hair on his cheek, light as a moth's wing. The curve of her lips, the taste of them. The impossible midnight blue of her eyes. But Bonnie had reached Elena. Elena's spirit, her soul, was still somewhere near. Of anyone, he should be able to summon it. He had Power at his command. And he had more right than anyone to seek her. He knew how it was done. Shut your eyes. Picture the person you want to draw near. That was easy. He could see Elena, feel her, smell her. Then call them, let your longing reach out into the emptiness. Open yourself and let your need be felt. Easier still. He didn't give a damn about the danger. He gathered all his yearning, all his pain, and sent it out searching like a prayer. And felt†¦ nothing. Only void and his own loneliness. Only silence. His Power wasn't the same as Bonnie's. He couldn't reach the one thing he loved most, the one thing that mattered to him. He had never felt so alone in his life. â€Å"You want what?† Bonnie said. â€Å"Some sort of records about the history of Fell's Church. Particularly about the founders,† Stefan said. They were all sitting in Meredith's car, which was parked a discreet distance behind Vickie's house. It was dusk of the next day and they had just returned from Sue's funeral-all but Stefan. â€Å"This has something to do with Sue, doesn't it?† Meredith's dark eyes, always so level and intelligent, probed Stefan's. â€Å"You think you've solved the mystery.† â€Å"Possibly,† he admitted. He had spent the day thinking. He'd put the pain of last night behind him, and once again he was in control. Although he could not reach Elena, he could justify her faith in him-he could do what she wanted done. And there was a comfort in work, in concentration. In keeping all emotion away. He added, â€Å"I have an idea about what might have happened, but it's a long shot and I don't want to talk about it until I'm sure.† â€Å"Why?† demanded Bonnie. Such a contrast to Meredith, Stefan thought. Hair as red as fire and a spirit to go with it. That delicate heart-shaped face and fair, translucent skin were deceptive, though. Bonnie was smart and resourceful-even if she was only beginning to find that out herself. â€Å"Because if I'm wrong, an innocent person might get hurt. Look, at this point it's just an idea. But I promise if I find any evidence tonight to back it up, I'll tell you all about it.† â€Å"You could talk with Mrs. Grimesby,† Meredith suggested. â€Å"She's the town librarian, and she knows a lot about the founding of Fell's Church.† â€Å"Or there's always Honoria,† Bonnie said. â€Å"I mean, she was one of the founders.† Stefan looked at her quickly. â€Å"I thought Honoria Fell had stopped communicating with you,† he said carefully. Stefan was surprised. He didn't entirely like the idea of Elena's journal on display. But Honoria's records might be exactly what he was looking for. Honoria had not just been a wise woman; she had been well versed in the supernatural. A witch. â€Å"The library's closed by now, though,† Meredith said. â€Å"That's even better,† said Stefan. â€Å"No one will know what information we're interested in. Two of us can go down there and break in, and the other two can stay here. Meredith, if you'll come with me-â€Å" â€Å"I'd like to stay here, if you don't mind,† she said. â€Å"I'm tired,† she added in explanation, seeing his expression. â€Å"And this way I can get my watch over with and get home earlier. Why don't you and Matt go and Bonnie and I stay here?† Stefan was still looking at her. â€Å"Okay,† he said slowly. â€Å"Fine. If it's all right with Matt.† Matt shrugged. â€Å"That's it, then. It might take us a couple of hours or more. You two stay in the car with the doors locked. You should be safe enough that way.† If he was right in his suspicions, there wouldn't be any more attacks for a while-a few days at least. Bonnie and Meredith should be safe. But he couldn't help wonder what was behind Meredith's suggestion. Not simple tiredness, he was sure. â€Å"By the way, where's Damon?† Bonnie asked as he and Matt started to leave. Stefan felt his stomach muscles tighten. â€Å"I don't know.† He had been waiting for someone to ask that. He hadn't seen his brother since last night, and he had no idea what Damon might be doing. â€Å"He'll show up eventually,† he said, and closed the door on Meredith's, â€Å"That's what I'm afraid of.† He and Matt walked to the library in silence, keeping to the shadows, skirting areas of light. He couldn't afford to be seen. Stefan had come back to help Fell's Church, but he felt sure Fell's Church didn't want his help. He was a stranger again, an intruder here. They would hurt him if they caught him. The library lock was easy to pick, just a simple spring mechanism. And the journals were right where Bonnie had said they would be. Stefan forced his hand away from Elena's journal. Inside was the record of Elena's last days, in her own handwriting. If he started thinking about that now†¦ He concentrated on the leather-bound book beside it. The faded ink on the yellowing pages was hard to read, but after a few minutes his eyes got accustomed to the dense, intricate writing with its elaborate curlicues. It was the story of Honoria Fell and her husband, who with the Smallwoods and a few other families had come to this place when it was still virgin wilderness. They had faced not only the dangers of isolation and hunger but of native wildlife. Honoria told the story of their battle to survive simply and clearly, without sentimentality. With a prickling at the back of his neck, he reread the entry carefully. At last he leaned back and shut his eyes. He'd been right. There was no longer any doubt in his mind. And that meant he must also be right about what was going on in Fell's Church now. For an instant, bright sickness washed over him, and an anger that made him want to rip and tear and hurt something. Sue. Pretty Sue who had been Elena's friend had died for†¦ that. A blood ritual, an obscene initiation. It made him want to kill. But then the rage faded, replaced by a fierce determination to stop what was happening and set things right. I promise you, he whispered to Elena in his own mind. I will stop it somehow. No matter what. He looked up to find Matt looking at him. Elena's journal was in Matt's hand, closing itself over his thumb. Just then Matt's eyes looked as dark a blue as Elena's. Too dark, full of turmoil and grief and something like bitterness. â€Å"You found it,† Matt said. â€Å"And it's bad.† â€Å"Yes.† â€Å"It would be.† Matt pushed Elena's journal back into the case and stood. There was a ring almost of satisfaction in his voice. Like somebody who's just proved a point. â€Å"I could have saved you the trouble of coming here.† Matt surveyed the darkened library, jingling change in his pocket. A casual observer might have thought he was relaxed, but his voice betrayed him. It was raw with strain. â€Å"You just think of the worst thing you can imagine and that's always the truth,† he said. â€Å"Matt†¦Ã¢â‚¬  Sudden concern stabbed at Stefan. He'd been too preoccupied since coming back to Fell's Church to look at Matt properly. Now he realized that he'd been unforgivably stupid. Something was terribly wrong. Matt's whole body was rigid with tension lying just under the surface. And Stefan could sense the anguish, the desperation in his mind. â€Å"Matt, what is it?† he said quietly. He got up and crossed to the other boy. â€Å"Is it something I did?† â€Å"I'm fine.† â€Å"You're shaking.† It was true. Fine tremors were running through the taut muscles. â€Å"I said I'm fine!† Matt swung away from him, shoulders hunched defensively. â€Å"Anyway, what could you have done to upset me? Besides taking my girl and getting her killed, I mean?† This stab was different, it was somewhere around Stefan's heart and it went straight through. Like the blade that had killed him once upon a time. He tried to breathe around it, not trusting himself to speak. â€Å"It was the truth.† Stefan waited a moment and then added, levelly, â€Å"But it's not the whole problem, is it?† Matt didn't answer. He stared at the floor, pushing something invisible with the side of one shoe. Just when Stefan was about to give up, he turned with a question of his own. â€Å"What's the world really like?† â€Å"What's†¦ what?† â€Å"The world. You've seen a lot of it, Stefan. You've got four or five centuries on the rest of us, right? So what's the deal? I mean, is it basically the kind of place worth saving or is it essentially a pile of crap?† Stefan shut his eyes. â€Å"Oh.† â€Å"And what about people, huh, Stefan? The human race. Are we the disease or just a symptom? I mean, you take somebody like-like Elena.† Matt's voice shook briefly, but he went on. â€Å"Elena died to keep the town safe for girls like Sue. And now Sue's dead. And it's all happening again. It's never over. We can't win. So what does that tell you?† â€Å"Matt.† â€Å"What I'm really asking is, what's the point? Is there some cosmic joke I'm not getting? Or is the whole thing just one big freaking mistake? Do you understand what I'm trying to say here?† â€Å"I understand, Matt.† Stefan sat down and ran his hands through his hair. â€Å"If you'll shut up a minute, I'll try to answer you.† Matt drew up a chair and straddled it. â€Å"Great. Take your best shot.† His eyes were hard and challenging, but underneath Stefan saw the bewildered hurt that had been festering there. â€Å"I've seen a lot of evil, Matt, more than you can imagine,† Stefan said. â€Å"I've even lived it. It's always going to be a part of me, no matter how I fight it. Sometimes I think the whole human race is evil, much less my kind. And sometimes I think that enough of both our races is evil that it doesn't matter what happens to the rest. â€Å"When you get down to it, though, I don't know any more than you do. I can't tell you if there's a point or if things are ever going to turn out all right.† Stefan looked straight into Matt's eyes and spoke deliberately. â€Å"But I've got another question for you. So what?† Matt stared. â€Å"So what?† â€Å"Yeah. So what.† â€Å"Yeah, so what?† Stefan leaned forward. â€Å"So what are you going to do, Matt Honeycutt, if every bad thing you've said is true? What are you going to do personally? Are you going to stop fighting and swim with the sharks?† Matt was grasping the back of his chair. â€Å"What are you talking about?† â€Å"You can do that, you know. Damon says so all the time. You can join up with the evil side, the winning side. And nobody can really blame you, because if the universe is that way, why shouldn't you be that way too?† â€Å"Like hell!† Matt exploded. His blue eyes were searing and he had half risen from his chair. â€Å"That's Damon's way, maybe! But just because it's hopeless doesn't mean it's all right to stop fighting. Even if I knew it was hopeless, I'd still have to try. I have to try, damn it!† â€Å"I know.† Stefan settled back and smiled faintly. It was a tired smile, but it showed the kinship he felt right then with Matt. And in a moment he saw by Matt's face that Matt understood. â€Å"I know because I feel the same way,† Stefan continued. â€Å"There's no excuse for giving up just because it looks like we're going to lose. We have to try-because the other choice is to surrender.† â€Å"I'm not ready to surrender anything,† Matt said through his teeth. He looked as if he'd fought his way back to a fire inside him that had been burning all along. â€Å"Ever,† he said. â€Å"Yeah, well, ‘ever' is a long time,† Stefan said. â€Å"But for what it's worth, I'm going to try not to either. I don't know if it's possible, but I'm going to try.† â€Å"That's all anybody can do,† Matt said. Slowly, he pushed himself off the chair and stood straight. The tension was gone from his muscles, and his eyes were the clear, almost piercing blue eyes Stefan remembered. â€Å"Okay,† he said quietly. â€Å"If you found what you came for, we'd better get back to the girls.† Stefan thought, his mind switching gears. â€Å"Matt, if I'm right about what's going on, the girls should be okay for a while. But you go ahead and take over the watch from them. As long as I'm here there's something I'd like to read up on-by a guy named Gervase of Tilbury, who lived in the early 1200s.† â€Å"Even before your time, eh?† Matt said, and Stefan gave him the ghost of a smile. They stood for a moment, looking at each other. â€Å"All right. I guess I'll see you at Vickie's.† Matt turned to the door, then hesitated. Abruptly, he turned again and held out his hand. â€Å"Stefan-I'm glad you came back.† Stefan gripped it. â€Å"I'm glad to hear it† was all he said, but inside he felt a warmth that took away the stabbing pain. And some of the loneliness, too.